RUMINATIONS

As I sit nonchalantly on a rather quiet Diwali eve away from home preparing for my papers I had this instantaneous yet anticipated urge to write something. It took me a year to gather my wits and write something on Diwali, which has always played an indelible part of my journey from childhood through the revolting teenage years to the person I have become today (though it is still a personality in the making). I have never considered myself a self-proclaimed blogger since it is something I do just to relate with people around the globe. But the audience I have is very limited and not everyone likes to read long essays now by days.

Long story short this blogpost is about all those impalpable times when we don't realize that we are getting older and are probably expected to be wiser.
Owning a scooter was like the certainty in an Indian family when we were a kid. Ever wondered how as a kid we stood on the step floor enjoying the view first hand blowing the horn as the scooter passed by the crowd. That ecstasy was unmatched. How slowly and steadily we grew and our height blocked the field of vision and thus we had to restrict ourselves to sitting behind or riding the vehicle on our own. Gone are the carefree days.
Ever wondered how in a coeducational institution we were equally friends with boys then slowly a time came when we were split up into rows and columns and made to sit separately. Probably we grew up and favored this system too😆
Remember those days when school uniforms used to be the worse thing about school, except summer vacation assignments. How we fantasized about the foreign school students who had no dress code to school. As we grew up, wearing the same shirt to college becomes somewhat a daily routine. How tedious it gets to get up and decide what to wear, uniforms seem to be the best solution to this problem. We realize its all a myth.
Staying at home becomes peaceful rather than entertaining unnecessary chaos in life whereas as I kid I just used to find excuses and go out.
Starting to cook was a milestone for us as kids. Now the thought of cooking after classes and office hours dreads us.
The most relatable for me is my love for books. As a kid, I used to hate reading academic books and loved playing computer games and reading novels all night under my blanket. As I grew up I hate reading kindle and pdfs and all I could care about is just some spare time to read my books which I've hoarded for so long thinking myself as a self-proclaimed bibliophile. But the truth is I am just lazy nowadays to read books and any spare time I get all I can think of doing is binge-watching Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. No mainstream Netflix and chill because I can't afford to own an account without disrupting my entire sleep schedule.
And the list goes on...
As I sit alone on the eve of Diwali with my laptop, all I can think of is how far I have come an how I have evolved each Diwali. For me, Diwali actually meant letting go of my fears and accepting the unknown. This was done on the basis of Firecrackers, where I started with a tablet snake and Diwali toy gun followed by sparklers and matchstick the following years to flower pots, rockets leading to all sorts of bombs with their fancy names. Though some of them are off my checklist up until recently.
Diwali has always been close to my heart. The very ambiance of the air is different. As people say you may leave your hometown shift and stay at home during Diwali but this festival never leaves you. It has been 5-6 years since I've celebrated Diwali as I used to which currently implies my state of mind indirectly that I've resorted to my comfort zone instead of exploring the unknown. I've been to many more places now than when I was a kid but the wanderlust in me is still scared of the unknown.
Indeed we grew up responsible. Wish you all a very happy and safe Diwali💥😊